wearingthestars | TRP Inbox

"That would be a joke. Which clearly you are not in the space for." Billy pivots.
"Seriously, what's happened? What's going on?"

No, he's not in the space for it. He's a bad person Billy!

"He's only nineteen."

Yeah, he's lacking a lot of context here...

"...Okay? And that's...bad? Who are we talking about?"

Is he though? Who had Billy been asked to magic up an ice cream birthday cake, complete with number shaped candles for a 1 and a 9 for just yesterday? Come on, man, keep up.

"Of course it's bad. He's nineteen and I'm in my mid twenties. God, I'm fucking old."

Ah. Right. If Billy had been born a little later he might be more concerned about the age difference, but he gives him a blank look like he doesn't really understand what the problem is. Especially considering-

"...I'm with someone in their hundreds, Tommy. If you're looking for me to agree with you I might be the wrong guy."

"Yeah, well, you're in your twenties too, and a god," Tommy says, because he clearly thinks that's a whole different thing. "And he's not either of those things. He's nineteen and no one has ever been nice to him in his life and I shouldn't be flirting with him."

Because it's manipulative, right? Right.

Billy's not sure how much a difference that makes, but he considers for a moment.

"I mean- you clearly have some concerns about it. So that's...worth looking at. He is an adult though, and you're not like...his boss or anything. I don't think it's that weird?"

It's a difference because the guy is only nineteen today (and he has no clue said guy is up on the bridge at this moment talking to Gladio about the same situation). Tommy buries his face in his hands and groans before collapsing dramatically on his bed.

"He's also straight, B. What do we say about falling for pretty young straight boys?"

Don't do it. Danger zone. Turn around.

Wow. You've got it bad brother. Billy tries to remember how old Kenny was? Had Tommy had this same fit of dramatics over him?
He laughs softly and takes a seat on the edge of the bed so he can pat Tommy's head apologetically.

"It's a lesson in heartbreak? Tell me what happened. What changed?"

He doesn't have it at all, thank you very much. It's just... Geez. It was just complicated. And excuse you, Kyle was in college, so that was more appropriate than this. And Shiro was older than him. So was David for that matter. And Eli.

No, the dramatics just go hand in hand with Tommy and guys. Sure he hit on them, sure he liked them, but it was always so much harder to accept that about himself, even when he was out and proud before he started getting involved with them. And the older he got, the more he admitted to himself he wanted substance and not just hook ups.

"I don't know. There was this moment toward the end of the surfing part of his birthday thing yesterday. We were wrestling in the water and I let him pin me and just... There was just something in how he looked at me. And I didn't get it until now, but... NO, it's not possible. He's straight. But then I realized later I'd been flirting with him some and that's so not okay. I'm supposed to be his best friend and his support not... Not checking him out because he's got a bit of muscles he tries to hide because he's all ashamed of his scars."

God. Fuck.

"I compared his scars to Kintsugi. If dude wasn't straight as fuck he might have seriously thought I was coming onto him."

Billy thinks you are way over thinking this. Especially if he didn't question when he was the younger party.

Drama and Tommy definitely go hand in hand, there's no denying that. Billy listens and nods and resists the urge to call his brother an idiot.

"...so you were wrestling and there was a moment?" he repeats, "Where he looked at you with....the look. And you came out of that thinking he's straight and you did something wrong?" Is he getting all of that?

"If he was gay, and your friend, and you crushed on him, but he wasn't interested, would that make you a bad person?"

Hey, he is an idiot. So yeah, thinking that isn't wrong. Tommy's estimation of his intelligence isn't high. That's just what it's about.

"I'm probably imagining the look. I mean, he's clearly straight."

But yes, he did think he'd done something wrong. Ogling this beautiful man with golden hair and eyes like the sky was probably wrong.

"If he wasn't so young, no."

"Yeah, you keep saying that," Billy notes, arching a brow. Like...a lot. Which of us are you trying to convince? "You'd know better than me. The guy was bleeding out when I met him, we didn't really get to talking about his sexual preferences."

He snorts softly at Tommy's answer. "Okay, if your ages were switched, would you feel bad about it?"

Would he feel bad about it? He laughs and shakes his head. Of course not. That's ridiculous.

"My physical years and mental ones don't even line up in so many ways. And I was literally experimented on, you know?"

So that ages a guy mentally too.

"Okay, so why is it fine for you to be 19 with an early 20s person and not him? Hypothetically." And hey, don't even get into what their actual ages might be. For all they know they've only existed since the first twins were born, which would make Tommy the younger one. But that shit is complicated.

"You're literally inventing reasons to be upset. You have a cute friend. You can either just stay friends or you can take a shot and see if he's into it too. And if not, you still have friend."

Don't even bring up their original lives, man. That's a headache he isn't going to measure right now. He's got way more years of active memories than he's lived, so he knows what he is.

"Are you not even listening?" he asks, absolutely exasperated. "And what if I take a shot and we aren't friends? Like, I'm the friend he's got. The person helping him heal. I can't take that from him by making him feel weird."

"You and Kate are still friends. What is this whole assumption that if you tell someone you're interested and they aren't you can never speak again?? You're a grown ass man. You should understand relationships are more complex than that."

Dummy.

Him and Kate were on again off again with stupid amounts of drama until David. Doesn't he get that? Geez.

"Take isn't turned off by the fact that I'm into a guy or a chick. But when he's horrified that his male best friend might be interested in him he could shut me out. You know that."

Dudes are always weird with this shit. And Billy's young.

"I'm a grown ass queer man, and he's a young ass straight man. That's the issue man."

"And I all ready told you, if that's the sort of person he is, then you shouldn't be his friend," Billy says with a more serious expression. "Straight dudes can learn to handle this shit just like straight girls have had to put up with from them forever. He doesn't have to like you back, but if you liking him is an issue, then he's the problem."

Tommy sighs, arm thrown over his head. No. It's not like that. It's...

"Listen. He's someone who might be that now but who you can pull back from it. I swear you, I can see that in him. But I'm not losing that and him over an initial prejudice that he maybe needs to learn to get past, right?"

He's probably just over-blowing this too.

"It's not really something that's gonna matter, because I'm not saying anything. Just, you know, he's young, okay? It's not right."

Billy sighs heavily, not sure Tommy's listened to a thing he's said here, just looping right back around to the same points. So, new tactic-

"Fine, you're right. He's too young. Problem solved. You do nothing." Is that better? Is that what you want to hear Tommy?

Yeah. That's exactly what he wants to hear. Thank you! Finally!

"That's for the best, right? Like, if I get too attached and close and like him, he goes home. And if he goes home he dies. I can't do that to him," he says.

As if that makes sense.

"So can you just... make it go away?"

Dummy.

"..." Billy fixes him with a look. One that only get's worse with that request.

"Okay- first off- no. I don't do that. Don't you ever ask me to do that. And second- ....you don't have anything to do with who comes and goes in this place Tommy. I need you to tell me you understand that. If he goes home, it has nothing to do with anything you did or didn't do. You have no control over that. And if you're stupid enough to throw away getting close to people because sometimes we lose them- then you're going to be really fucking, Tommy. People leave us. Eventually. One way or another. That's life here and back home. You have the time you have, so stop wasting it."

Tommy wants to roll his eyes. Of course there's something going on. The Agrii hate him or something. Or the Atroma assholes. Hasn't he seen the pattern? Come on man, tell him you've seen it.

"There are actual malicious aliens watching the aliens that watch us, probably. Of course it can be how it works!"

But yeah, okay, he gets it. Don't ask for getting it fixed. But he's so frustrated.

"So there's no fixing any of it. How inappropriate it is."

"So you're just going to be miserable forever? How is that any better?" Billy counters, wanting to roll his eyes right back.

"You're the one who thinks that, so yeah, you're the only one that can fix it. I don't do that stuff."

It's a sensitive issue, with what Loki convinced Teddy he'd done. He's done a lot of stupid shit with his magic, but he's not going to use it to meddle with love or memories.

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(billy's views are not necessarily my more grown up views, lol)

he's still early twenties (tommy acts so old and he's only got, like, two years on his brother)

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